To: Save a shred of decency
From: a pathetic girl, confused
I give this notice of my departure
to let my absence be excused
I'll be back when the money comes
and leave these leaking rafters
I'll be back when the thunder's drum
fades into a quiet laughter
I'll be back when stupidity reverts
to second language status
but until then my life diverts
Dr. Horrible, I've come to enlist
but it's plain to se, evil inside of me...is on the rise...
I'll be back when I can sing
those happy songs and not feel sick.
No more Wombats, Nash, or Owl City;
more appropriately: "Lost" and "The Scientist"
I'm not on a joyride for
a thrilling, futile game
If I do this I'm gonna do it right
I can't go on with things the same,
(Joel Osteen with his plastic grin,
"You'll see the light, my cult!
You can redeem unsightly sin,
donate money and consult!")
Sitting on the floor with my head in my hands,
I can only suggest I was never okay.
Unraveling my plans into single hair strands,
undoing the life I'd portrayed.
I can wash my hands of you.
But you can't wash your hands of me.
(thankfully?)
The good old days, the honest man;
The restless heart, the Promised Land,
A subtle kiss that no one sees;
A broken wrist and a picture piece.
I'll keep you at arms distance
so you're always at close reach
pulling you close is just passive resistance
my security, when necessary, breached.
I'll clasp your hand around my fist,
throwing empty praise upon your name.
I'll smile, perfect the Judas kiss,
and embody Peter's shame.
I felt so sure of everything,
My love to you so well received
And I just strutted around your town
Knowing I didn't let you down
The truth be known, the truth be told
My heart was always fairly cold
I was always told that ugly faces
stick around for good
seeing from my false embraces
the insides also would
Like Sting, I've built a fortress
encircling my heart
not something I should care profess
but deceptions I must part
and I won't feel a thing
and I figure I'm not the only one
with their back up against the wall;
revolving universe undone,
I'm beginning to feel small.
But I can't help myself,
and before I turn around,
I'll make it known through shouts and whispers
the wall was never there at all.
You still don't believe, you don't believe
You don't believe, your grievances show
When your soapbox unfolds
But please come down from that cloud you're sitting on
Will you really take my crap?
Forgoing respect for ridicule?
From what it seems, I spit and swear
Your silence endears me the fool
It's funny, your indifference
seems to get to me the most
breaking through my hardest defense
and deflating all my boasts
please don't fight these hands that are holding you
Repeated call inside my head: "Pack up and leave this joint!"
but it's the only home I've ever known,
and when I reach my breaking point,
it's the only home I'll ever own
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start
I can wash my hands of you
(the blood is thinning)
but I can't wash my hands of me
(it's much too sticky)
and you won't wash your hands of me.
(thankfully?)
Like faith needs a doubt
Like a freeway out
I need your love
Maybe I shan't leave after all,
In that case, I think,
(thankfully.)
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